Whether your usual number system is broken down, or simply in need of an Eul-change, you will find plenty of absolute value in this talk. I'll remove that annoying ring from your definition of prime and roll-over your infinite odometer. Once your number system is complete, we'll travel local-to-global, and visit Hensel $&$ Gertrud in a magical 20Dream-land where a series converges if and only if the the terms tend to zero. This talk should be much more accessible than its abstract. I encourage you to attend, if only for the grapes.